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How to manage verbal abuse & threatening behaviour
Researchers found that reaction to a verbal attack can seriously affect the outcome. When faced with someone shouting abuse or just staring silently, a number of physiological changes take place.
Increased heart rate, raised blood glucose levels and increased adrenalin among other changes cause an instinctve 'fight or flight reaction'. The most common reaction is TO FREEZE which may appear as aggressive
You must signal non-aggression at an early stage in the interaction.
- Control your breathing rate. Inhale deeply and exhale slowly. This helps to increase a feeling of inner calmness and reduces panic and fear signals.
- Adopt a relaxed posture. If standing, stand with your legs slightly apart, one foot slightly behind the other.
- Use open hand language. Hold your hands down, either at your sides or gently clasped in front of you. Occasionally, stress what you say with a slow, open hand gesture.
- Listen actively. Reinforce you listening with occasional verbal affirmation 'hmmm/yes/ah, ha' and head nods.
- Sit down. This is not always easy to do, particularly if the aggressor is looming over you. However, by sitting down in a controlled manner you are indicating a willingness to stay and therefore stressing the importance of what the aggressor has to say.
- Keep you voice low and steady This is not always easy, particularly when your vocal cords are tight and your throat dry.
- Show you are interested and concerned. This is the time to ask the 'How?' questions not the 'Why?' ones. 'How can I Help you' not 'Why are you like this?'
- Empathise with the aggressor. 'That sounds bad' or 'I'd be angry too if it happened to me'. Do this only if you are being sincere. Insincerity will be picked up and will escalate the situation.
- Ask for permission to make a notes. This helps to slow the aggressor down and stresses the importance of the information the aggressor has. This is a defusion technique as it moves from the act of aggression being expressed to what the aggressor has to say.
- Use eye movement. Occasionally meet the aggressor's eyes to stress of acknowledge a point will help, but always avert you eyes before a staring match develops To discuss a problem helping staff to manage verbal abuse and threatening behviour contact us or call 01582 792875
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